5'10 Germ.

2012-01-01T23:12:00.001+05:00

The fountains mingle with the river
And the rivers with the ocean,
The winds of Heaven mix for ever
With a sweet emotion;
Nothing in the world is single,
All things by a law divine
In one spirit meet and mingle -
Why not I with thine?

P. B. Shelley T

About 2011.

2011-12-31T22:10:00.005+05:00

2011 has been the most perilous year of my life so far. To say that it was a mere roller-caster ride would be an understatement. Ironically, the morals taken have been lesser than my experiences, which is to say I've grown little over the course of the previous 365 days but I'll still blog about the lessons I've learned so far.

Every year I make it the first point of my resolution to curb my temper and stubbornness and I fail miserably. Regardless, I do suffer from the ramifications of these traits. This year, however, I learned the art of using some of my ferocity to my advantage that is, I channeled both of them in supporting my stance in the projects I undertook. Especially to resist unnecessary control of people who wanted to bring their 'dominance' in the limelight. Now that didn't mean I took the practice to the brink of making arrogance ostensible. Though I still resolve to controlling my anger as it has in most of the cases, kept my face to the ground and I hope I master this weakness in the coming year.

I've also learned how hand-made cards can really warm people's hearts. I adopted this practice of card making for many people from a friend of mine who always used to make cards (No matter how simple) for the most random people on their big day. I've realized if nothing, your little act of good can really make a difference for one person, no matter how distant, as it gives them a moment to think over the 15 minutes of your pure devotion in their name while making their card. Plus, it doesn't kill to spread smiles, yes.

Also, I've discovered the true essence of inhumanity and the fact that no matter how close people are to you, they'll still shove aside your best motives if they conflict with their personal interests (Which are senile and they're well aware of it). It goes to show that star plus doesn't always transcend the boundaries of reality. I've concluded that if relations, no matter how close, emanate more of depression than bliss, it's better to leave them straight away. Of course, new forms come always take place and I include the very immediate of bonds as well. Really one has to toughen himself/herself with the same bitterness that is inflicted on him by his surroundings.

Apart from the aforementioned, I've learned now important it is to be self-sufficient and to let go of the future deliberately instilled in one's head if he/she wants to achieve happiness even if it calls for contradicting the views one has been openly expressing and mocking others for adopting. In my case, I find happiness following my dreams that conflict with my set career path and I feel very guilty to have had spoken someone else' language.

Lastly, I've learned that sometimes, a compound of your desired opportunities emanates from the least of expected places. You'd never think you's be able to hone through med school work and be not only accredited, but appreciated for that. So yes, life is full of little little surprise.

Noting the above, although 2011 has been adventurous its own context. I look forward to gaining far more and losing little in 2012. Happy New Year every one. Stay blessed. :)

2011-12-12T02:11:00.002+05:00

You know you've a life gushing with constant activity when you have a brilliant concept for a sequel to your 'Blackbird' looming in your head and nudging you but you don't have the time or energy to execute it. The gifts I've taken for granted.

On a different note, the '48 laws of power' is something you should go through in this life time. Conceitedly seductive is its essence that might penetrate your views on life on permanent basis.

Emobloggersstevejobsyouandme.

2011-10-05T23:28:00.008+05:00

Today I felt like accrediting some of the few factions and individuals of the soceity because well, I'm a generous gracious little being. My salutes to each and everyone of them as follows.

To 3mo [three-mo] bloggers, I'm still surprised at the consistency with which you continue to mope over your one misfortune for such a long period of time. I'm more awestruck at the strength of your brain to bear your persistent depression and STILL not get stroke or hemorrhage. Wah, mubarak!

PS: My personal thanks (not really) to you for making sex look absolutely detestable with the long masochistic proses about your sexual experience with your long lost love for people who have yet to experience it.

To you, Steve Jobs [RIP]. Though I'm not a fan of Apple products nor do I plan on buying any in near future, I have to admit that you really did inspire a plethora of people (including me) with your pure tenacity to achieve the most you could have in the 56 years you had in this world. I'll also hand it down to the masses that you were able to encapsulate in your shell of corporate slavery by presenting them with a new technological product that was able to supersede the 1 year old prototype that wasn't even exploited to it utmost potential. [Observe a minute of silence]

My salute also goes to you, the people. I salute your receptive attitude towards capitalistic control and how you can manage to blow off large sums of money on invasive technology that will be hardly of much use and more of your own lard layering in your bums to be your best friends forever. After all, who needs to actually walk to get their debit cards cashed, right?

Lastly, to me. For having no productive input in life whatsoever. Oh how I wish I were born in the 70's.

Black birds.

2011-10-04T00:36:00.007+05:00

I once bred five black birds
Fluttering wings in the white sky
Camouflaged where were the herds
Of clouds shaping my sins awry

So bright were the speckles
The rays misguided my eyes
As I searched for the feathery freckles
Bathed in black were their cries

My numbness kept on pinching me
The white drapery was so sly
It imprisoned my eyes in its radiant glee
And blinded them to the birds too shy

So sudden was the sudden happiness
And I felt ecstatic and high
There were no misdeeds to stress
Of a deluded frenzy who never asked "why?"

So flawed were my perceptions
Soon each of their feathers failed to comply
And one by one fell from their lesions
As my little black birds began to die.

A little mellow is a human essential, dear fellow.

DeviantART.

2011-09-30T19:17:00.004+05:00

It feels rather strange to delete a Flickr account after 4 years. Oh well, on the plus side, I've cut my art stocks down to a manageable size. All of my photography shall be now solely concentrated on my dA gallery. Don't ask about the history of my username. (That is, if you're nice enough to look.) :]

DeviantART Gallery.

Kingtox.

2011-09-18T16:00:00.005+05:00

Machar wavering

Teardrops of the sky their benefactor

Dengue.

5-7-5 thought to be haiku (And then being told it's not Haiku). Hoha.

But dengue is sad. However, it inspires me to use incoherent syllables. Therefore, dengue is good in a way.

DSLR trash-wars.

2011-09-13T16:08:00.006+05:00

So recently this friend of mine had his unilateral thesis published on the Express Tribune on the statement that has it's viral roots equivalent to the rapidly expanding consumerism of DSLRs: "Owning a DSLR doesn't make you a photographer."

Well of course, being an avid photographer myself, I'll have to agree with the ground reality of this clause that will be definitely prove to be acerbic to the many proud of owners of this digital entity. DSLRs have become more of a commodity that is sought by many blind eyes whose perspectives yield from the eye of the lens and of course, the product with it's digitally instigated factors (especially the depth of focus) is appreciated by the masses as a work of art and as a concoction of the talent and concept of the photographer. This trend has also enhanced the evils of capitalism and is analogous to the resentment of an ardent Apple iPhone consumer basking in the glory of his expensive 800$ (I didn't bother to check the price) iPhone 4 only to be soon iOutdated by the advent of a newer, better, classier, trendier and more efficient iPhone 5. Hence, people with minimal photographic background have started spending ridiculously large amount of money on shit expensive DSLRs that is better than their competitors just to have the feel of a photographer. But that's just one side of the argument.

Now, ever since my friend's article got published. People on my Facebook list have been tagging people who have DSLRs and personally attacking them without having any knowledge about their photographic background. In other words, typical stereotyping has stemmed from this one statement. And what's more queer is how many of the DSLR owners in my list, just to conceal their imminent guilt, have been defending their ownership by tagging other DSLR owners instead of contesting the offense with a logical argument. I've seen people gloating about practicing 'photography' with pocket film and 3 mp phone camera phones that were never different than the apparent SNAPSHOTS they take now with their 2 lakh Nikon D300.

If you ask me, photography is an aesthetic compound of the digital tool and well as the human mind. Digital tools only execute the photographer's idea but for me, a photograph is a multifaceted story that is not depicted merely by words. It is a tale that circumvents beauty in the mundane of things, the genius in the human mind, the appeal to the human eye and a chance for the audience to find their own story in the subject unprecedented by anyone. Obviously a camera cannot find the perfect lighting, it cannot create the scenario, it cannot edit a photo to suit your mood of the picture you take. It's simply a gadget that helps manifest your idea with a little manipulation. Be it film, DSLR or a cellphone camera. It is an orgasmic vent for your soul.

But I'm not against DSLRs, they're rightfully one of the best gadgets that help passionate photographers nurture their skills. They are surely unique in their own way, they make your images clearer, they help you perfect your focus and add pretty bokehs to add some vibrancy to your image. But before you're known as a photographer for the awesomeness your DSLR captures, be sure to clear your conscience of the fact that being an artist you can create beauty out of any medium of photography. If you really uphold the belief of you being an artist in your own eyes, that is. :)

Here's one story.

A photographer went to a socialite party in New York. As he entered the front door, the host said
‘I love your pictures - they’re wonderful; you must have a fantastic camera.’
He said nothing until dinner was finished, then:
‘That was a wonderful dinner; you must have a terrific stove.'

Kia aapnay Ghalib dekhi hai?

2011-08-19T02:33:00.001+05:00

So I really don’t understand what the world has shaped into these days. It seems as if a stigma of misfortunes that takes it's root in man’s progressing debility to think has swept the population by a milestone. If one should start penning the most conspicuous woes of humanity, even then a point will come when he will be hit by the epiphany of having wasted time, energy and ink as the common solution to all of it is only a myth dreamt and forgotten. And to think of a solution is not just a chore, but a chore further occluded by bigotry that’s now not limited to a handful of incidents, but permeated in workaday vocabulary so much so that if cited with introspection, it’s a serious problem.

Bigotry is practiced in all respects really. Be it a conversation about condemning pathans as being ‘Begharat’ for putting a price on the femme half of the community [I’m a pathan myself mind you.], a gunshot wound abrading an ANP activist with love from an MQM member, a mere disregard that spurs in the head of a woman for her daughter in law or hurling profanities at a television evangelist over the ‘gaalis’ he so very fervently said, which by the way is the issue I feel like addressing.

During the course of the viral leakage of Dr. Aamir Liaquat’s behind-the-scenes antics on Facebook, I couldn’t help but feel disgusted at the reaction of the public. I never implied that I had an affinity for him to begin with and I don’t have it now either. But In people who I saw the aspiring and determined youth of today made me realize my folly for having seen them as so. What surprised me was how they reacted in the profane fashion they themselves condemn Dr.AL for. When I first saw the link on my newsfeed, I felt a bit reluctant to play and actually see Dr.AL for the ‘two-faced hypocrite’ people ascribed to his name. But having mustered the slight courage to hit play, I analyzed how intricately had the scandal been contrived. That is not to say that I condone Dr.AL for much of his grotesque behavior on set such as his reaction to the much sensitive issue of committing suicide in order to preserve someone’s dignity, but in manifold of places the mouthing was not in harmony with the sound. For instance, the credibility of the video stood high because there was correlation between his mouthing of his words but right where the ‘oo’s and ‘oa’s of some of the abuses he seemingly gave away to his influential guests, that’s where the sync got lost. Also, as the video neared it’s ends, the sync was completely lost and the edifice of it’s credibility toppled. Even professional video editors have deemed it as unauthentic.

Now what our societal mindset loves is just surfacing things off superficially and then making a great deal out of conspiracies that really won’t make a difference in the end. If Dr.AL is a hypocrite then spare him for being human. We all have split personalities; we bitch, we lie and we abuse at one point or the other. Had we not been such we would’ve each have been god. Sabotaging and falsifying isn’t the key, solving it is. There are other important issues residing and growing that need to be looked towards rather than wasting time substantiating bogus information.

Awesome!

2011-08-02T23:21:00.002+05:00

Seriously, learn from this. Now THIS is what you call marketing tactics!

I'm suchay liar. :P

2011-07-14T00:38:00.001+05:00

On 19^th of June 2011, “SOCH”, an independent student body oriented organization that aims at ameliorating the medical prospects of the indigent patients at Civil Hospital, took the initiative of organizing the “DUHS Carnival”. The carnival spanned from 2pm to 11 pm and invited an array of young individuals from all over Karachi other than the students of DUHS to add their unique colours to the event’s canvas much analogous to the bright ambiance of the summers and make it all the more memorable. The event was held on the lush green ground of the Ojha Campus and was contained in what paved a large area for accommodating all of the assets it had in store for it’s attendees. SOCH had also been vigilant about the pervasive security crisis and ensured safety for all the guests.

Upon entering, one found the ground adorned with stalls, each of which uniquely exhibited elements pertaining to our culture, fields of education, entertainment and most importantly scrumptious desi food and drinks! The burgeoning inflation was something one escaped from when it came to buying the delicacies and the likes because all of the items came at quite affordable prices. The most popular, however, was the blueberry slush that was seemingly in every other person’s hands.

Apart from things for sale, the Carnival materialized the finest forms of entertainment including the “Pakistan’s David Blane” who confounded his viewers with his striking illusions, a large jumping castle and swings that revived the child in many of the attendees and made them relive the golden days of the past.

However, all of the aforementioned events soon became a mere prelude to the climax of the carnival as soon as a green Vitz with Faisal Kapadia and Bilal Maqsood of “Strings” inside gushed in the ground embarking their grand entrance. The adrenaline shot high in many as they waited impatiently outside the terminus of the concert field as the band warmed up. Within an hour an enthusiastic crowd rushed in the area and was taken by storm with String’s opening track “Yahan koi aanay wala hai”. Strings then continued to amaze and involve the audience with their subsequent hits and ended their saga with their latest number inspired by Faiza Ahmed Faiz’s “Main to dekhun ga”.

It was not long before the euphoria amongst the audience was escalated by Aunty Disco Project’s advent that honored DUHS with their second last concert before their split. They managed to impress a vast number of people with their innovative music; so much so much that it prompted an appreciable number of fans out of those who came to the Carnival oblivious of their existence. ADP ended their performance with their commercial hit “Sultanat” and left the crowd awestruck by their signature theatrics inclusive of the “Naved” factor as many who were present there would be familiar with. :P

To conclude the happenings, SOCH has made a remarkable effort by truly giving a different picture contrary to the much perceived prosaic image of medical institutions. The organizing team has also exemplified themselves as true pioneers by displaying sheer dedication with their endeavor to give the public a memorable experience and bar few can accomplish. We hope that their hard work reciprocates with an equally appreciable sum for charity and a drive to do further for what they stand for.

Out of subconsciousness.

2011-06-14T03:18:00.006+05:00

Has it ever happened that while having a conversation, you boil down to incorporating one mundane element of your current workaday life that inspires and materializes what ensues a diverse spectrum of anecdotes, philosophies and ideas in an almost perfect sequence forming a nexus, all spawned from that one thing you perceived to not have held much significance in any area except for the one it was stereotypically designed for.

I know it happened to me and led me to believe in the real power of the enigma we call subconsciousness. For when I spoke what followed that analogy related to the aforementioned element, it was not until after a periodic hiatus that I realized that I was able to mentally regurgitate every single word I uttered. It was an effortless vomit of that sequence. It made no sense to me how I made such perfect sense out of what I spoke, it literally felt effortless. For the first time in my life that portion of the conversation was there all along safely embalmed within my subconsciousness, it just had to be nudged slightly to be unleashed and it would take its toll in an immaculate fashion. But there was this mockery that region of my brain settled with, the mockery at my conscious self being liable for not thinking out of the box. Hence, it has instilled in me the feeling of slight guilt ever since and the question if I underestimate my genius.

It’s spring time in my head after a long winter. Now, I’ll never look at cadaveric bones the same way again. They serve a bigger purpose than just being simple tools of trade for the students studying subject of anatomy; they can change human lives with the example they provide as they’ve done mine. Needless to say, the human mind is a queer thing full of subtle mischief. I should perhaps expect these epiphanies more intently.

The Rain Song charms me. Out. (:

In memory of creativity.

2011-06-13T16:24:00.001+05:00

'Twas a mere moment etched in time.
Yet I dug in it even deeper.
Perceiving each hopeless second a platinum dime,
As I explored like a sordid reaper

Frail a vision as it was before,
It floundered in an ambiguous pattern.
The remnants of God escaped my core,
And into attics of the past never to return.

This excerpt of my insides was the missing link. Now lets get back on track shall we?

Help needed.

2011-06-09T15:42:00.006+05:00

Having a racing lifestyle devoid of creativity is worse than having non with sporadic surges of ideas. An exact phase that I've been entangled in for more than a year. I chose to battle these recurring thoughts and decided to render this phase transitory or even at one point, a myth. But sometimes when some thoughts that spur in the head starting as mere figments of imagination and soon evolving to take the form of a stigma conquering your every neuron take their shape, you're bound to be pushed on the marginal end of giving up. I think I might lay down my arms soon too lest I'm given some help.

Is it a writer's block? Is this part of maturing? Or the system conspiring against the burgeoning creativity of the human mind by curtailing it via the 9-5 epidemic? After all, it has been it's notion to keep the wealth among the selected for ages. I need help.

Surprise Surprise!

2011-05-06T23:05:00.002+05:00

When your best friend tells you 1 day before your big day that he won't be able to wish you on your birthday at 12 am because he's leaving for Ottawa from Montreal and his phone won't work there and at 1 am on your birthday, he phones you up and tells you that he's calling from Doha and will land in Karachi in 4 hours and come to your uni in 7 hours just to celebrate it with you. You'd have to be an idiot to not consider this your best birthday ever.
20. Awesome! \m/

Of royal bandhans and a potential polar shift.

2011-04-29T18:09:00.006+05:00

If there is anything worse than having substantive headlines escape newspapers, TV channels, Websites etc other than the Holy Kate-William Matrimony. People and my actual friends bolstering the irritating hype via a tirade of facebook statuses make me think otherwise, or just aggravate my annoyance over what is a wedding-turned-world-wide-glamor-event. And of course what could ever be able to touch the hearts of the local masses and include them in the festivity other than local news channels concocting their own depiction of the event with a rather strange desi list of the "Baabul" songs. For instance, the only bit that I manged to watch was when Kate M sat with her prince charming in the royal carriage and the song starts playing.

'Paalki mein ho k sawaar chali re..' No, seriously.

Its even more a nettle to see people buzz all day about how they would love to find their "prince charming" in the Kate William fashion and sighing their entrails in. If the royal couple really did want to share their joy with the world, why didn't they gratuitously give out free tickets to every unfortunate, downtrodden person in the UK who cannot afford a TV to watch the wedding live at least, and carry their rituals in some magnanimous arena and shower if not muno-salwa, then royal corn dogs? I'm glad they're done spreading happiness to war ridden areas and places with epidemics breaking out every now and then. After all, royalty heals.

On a much more self related subject, I recently got over with Clive Cussler’s “Polar shift” and it got me wondering that if the conspiracy theories about the end of the world at the hands of the Luciferian elite were to come into play, then the author’s clairvoyance is fully operational. According to the text, a polar shift is a phenomenon in which the Earth’s crust moves over its core [of which a major constituent is molten iron] if an assigned set of electromagnetic frequency waves are generated from a very powerful source, which in the book has taken the form of a series of transmitting marine vehicles. Obviously, if such an event occurs, not only a polar reversal is its much anticipated result but also ensue a myriad of catastrophic repercussions of epic proportions. We can all bow down to the Gods and adopt the faith some of us never had that is, IF we even get to live for the merely significant amount of time. And if this occurs in 2012 then I’m bound to doubt the author’s integrity as simply a writer which I won’t because I will be among the mortals hanging on the altar of time and the future. Maybe his book had a message for all of us. Come to think of it, the clandestine intelligence has already progressed decades ahead technology wise. This possibility of a potential polar shift is one predicament that embarked a slight surge of apprehension in me. Heck, for a moment I even began to wonder whether Prince William’s hair fell because he was contributing the product of his mind in devising the diabolical plans for Armageddon. After all, the Royal family is a prominent target of conspiracy theorists.

But that was during the time I was reading the book. Obviously the one thing about conspiracy is that it is never proven. Now I’ve simply brushed it all off and I say that the author has been successful in trying a knot in my brain with the tendrils of his creativity. Oh, how I wish my art could maneuver through a person’s set of thoughts and be born as a part of what his senses perceive to be the apparent world. That is my definition of success in creation.

Out.

2011-03-31T17:46:00.001+05:00

If this is the case then I'm morphologically inept. Period.

Of badassery and hypocrisy.

2011-03-11T12:53:00.009+05:00

When you're a medschool student you're obviously familiar with almost everything your body is imbued by. But what most of us don't understand is the credibility of one adroitly using his acquired knowledge to say some of most scathing abuses. Certainly the listener will perceive that doctor-to-be to be floundering his esoteric vocabulary quite innocently. For instance, if I'm to say. "You do realize that he reminds me of the canal on the middle third of the inter-gluteal cleft." I'm actually implying the literal term used for the word ARSEHOLE. Or I state that "XYZ truly deserves a bi-manual palpation of both anterior and posterior of her/his perennial region with a scalpel." What I literally mean would be too gruesome and pejorative a statement to spell it out to my readers; read esoteric. Ha!

Not only medical students can get away with saying abuses, they're also excused [or should I say appreciated] for human trafficking. There's necrotic trafficking in the form of real human skeletons for only 5000 Rs. in my college and it's so much promoted that I'm forced by my mom and the onerous coursework to buy half a human for Rs. 2000. Ironic isn't it? And what could be more badass than having to sleep with a dead human being right under your bed stuffed in a paper bag? So we're not all that boring. We're in a different league than calculus, a much more AWESOME league. Word. \m/

Plus it's really cool to see girls in pink tutu's carrying these bones all over. Makes me stereotype than as desi samurai chicks in school uniforms who masticate the shit outta people's remains.

Kinda like this

Come to think of it, I'm NOW loving Medschool. No matter when I graduate. So don't think of med school as an incubus. It's radical awesomeness.

On a much more self-updating update, I'm doing a photographic project depicting the metropolitan life in macro and panoramic for an acquaintance [Who is an assistant editor in a local magazine. Oddly enough, I never asked the name.] As I kept on clicking, I found an element of hypocrisy that projected out of a city as it hid the reds of blood that is shed almost every passing day in the name of political and religious bigotry, the whites of the drapery on the dead, the blacks and greens taking their separate secretarial factions on the toll; all disguised under the colours of fading culture I'm hopelessly trying to keep pseudo alive through my photos. To me, it feels as if I feign to not being aware of these tones that encompass me. Besides, my Photo shop skills are rusting, sadly. Or is it that I'm so used to dim tones that the morning psychedelic tones our city [literally and figuratively] pictures is not something I'm proficient at. Doh.

Well that's all for now.

Out.

Hot chocolate isn't hot.

2011-03-08T07:24:00.005+05:00

Ignore the title for it has nothing to do with whatever words I'm going to bulldoze my page with. And yes, blame my lack of creativity. [and of course the flippancy to bother searching for inspiration - NOT lack of inspiration!]

For the past few weeks I've been logging in and out of blogger . As soon as I would sign in, I would fool myself into not tapping the creator in me by saying. "I've better stuff to do than to waste time ranting". When in truth, I was apprehensive to do so because I feared I would've bade farewell to that creator long ago. Then out of nowhere 'The Zahir' by Paulo Coelho gorged in and depicted my state perfectly with the phase the protagonist, who was an author himself, was undergoing and how he conquered it. He just dared took the first step. It was, of course, ostensible that Paulo Coelho spoke of such audacity in one's character to be applied in all aspects of life as well. But I'll implicate his message here [if not anywhere else].

The past five months have almost transmuted my life into mundane story of epic proportions. Well you can't exactly expect much when you are in medschool and having your shelf introduced with yet another unwieldy anatomy book is a routine. Hell, even I laugh when I see myself in a white labcoat with a big "Dow University of Health Sciences" embroidered on its breast pocket. Primarily because I never saw myself as a doctor. But you see, when you're in university for only 27k per YEAR [Scholarship bitches!], you really aren't left with much choice except for euphoric endorsement. But every promising package has it's even more promising downside. The road towards becoming a full fledged doctor seems to have no terminus as there's a 5 years course that tests your memorizing skills to the abyss. A year of depressing residency and further 4 years of specializing and 8 years if someone wants to do it up there. -points head- So I'll be almost 30 when I graduate. That means when all of you will graduate, I'll still have 2 years to go half professional and while all of you will be well settled with your jobs and escalating promotions, I'll still be enrolled as an intern; fml. But oh well, I still enjoy studying the gorey internals so I'm up for it even if it means having the hair fall frequency increased by 10 folds, as is with my case.

A little view of what my college looks like.

The tousandth man.

2011-01-13T20:30:00.002+05:00

0NE man in a thousand, Solomon says.
Will stick more close than a brother.
And it's worth while seeking him half your days
If you find him before the other.

Nine hundred and ninety-nine depend
On what the world sees in you,
But the Thousandth Man will stand your friend
With the whole round world agin you.

'Tis neither promise nor prayer nor show
Will settle the finding for 'ee.
Nine hundred and ninety-nine of 'em go
By your looks, or your acts, or your glory.

But if he finds you and you find him,
The rest of the world don't matter;
For the Thousandth Man will sink or swim
With you in any water.

You can use his purse with no more talk
Than he uses yours for his spendings,
And laugh and meet in your daily walk
As though there had been no lendings.

Nine hundred and ninety-nine of 'em call
For silver and gold in their dealings;
But the Thousandth Man he's worth 'em all
Because you can show him your feelings.

His wrong's your wrong, and his right's your right,
In season or out of season.
Stand up and back it in all men's sight
With that for your only reason!

Nine hundred and ninety-nine can't bide
The shame or mocking or laughter,
But the Thousandth Man will stand by your side
To the gallows-foot - and after!

- Rudyard Kipling.

What justification?

2011-01-07T11:22:00.004+05:00

I couldn't be more disgusted at the sorry state of affairs in our country. It's a shame that even the most decent of the lot [Or so I assume] have become passive bigots at the hands of a heartless, fanatic murderer. By this I don't imply that I'm unilateral and having a firm standpoint over this issue. But youngsters who're putting up emotionally induced statuses on facebook and supporting this heinous act don't cease to amaze me.

I myself was going through comments on one of such aforementioned statuses on facebook. And one of them just made me smirk at the certitude of myopia.

"The Muslim inside me is happy Taseer got killed but the human inside me is sad." So are we Muslims not human? So Islam Doesn't teach humanity? Such Error in perspectives. If I'm to go in the nitty gritty details of this statement, I'd laugh at how people have started perceiving Islam.

I'll agree that what Salman Taseer did was wrong, but what Mumtaz Qadri did was never right either. The Governor has hurt the sentiments of the masses. But a single person deciding his fate in the spur of extremism is nothing more than a war monger. And people who once condemned the acts of the Taliban and now, openly bolster and endorse that same sentiment [only morphed from the effusing thoughts inside the turban to those in a uniform of the elite force] need to reminisce over the things they read in their Islamiat books back in the days.

The Prophet [PBUH] was never a person who'd support bigotry. He was a firm supporter of peace and influenced millions by bringing the message of Love and Unity Islam has to offer. He himself was hurled abuses at but never did he once curse the oppressors. And if he were among us today, he would have surely been saddened at such heterodoxy. Because if people started to perturb situations by taking the Law in their hands using Islam as their leverage, the nation will only be all the more retrogressive and give those who want to conquer all the more reasons to intervene and infiltrate. Now according to DAWN, the 'moderate' maulvis have refrained people from actually grieving over Salman Taseer's death or they shall find themselves facing the same retribution. This means an open license has been issued to individuals to simply kill anyone human enough to even form an opinion against the murder. No wonder people give up their faith and are mocking Islam.

Islam is already a victim of secretarial cleavages and Mumtaz Qadri has sparked further discern among even well educated Muslims within the same sect. Placing it in light of the practices of the Holy Prophet [PBUH], he always fought against people who initiated such divide and tried to create animosity among the believers. Hence, it's not people against this act who are blasphemous, it is the so called "hero" who sparked unrest among people under a unified faith who is blasphemous.

I couldn't have loved you more after this Ozzy Osbourne!

2010-12-15T13:59:00.002+05:00

Want Perfection? No.

2010-12-04T15:23:00.015+05:00

I've been backspacing back and forth to actually type down or more like orchestrate the surface of the layers of useless thoughts residing in the battered, completely disheveled attic of my mind. And whatever I have gathered so far from it is that the ostensible presence of my creative side: drawing, writing, photography, incessant ravings of whatever has been going in my life so far etc; has become infinitesimally minuscule. But I dare not add the word "hopelessly" to precede my verdict, for I don't give up.

Now anyone who bothers to read this fragment might wonder that I'm becoming one of those emotionally disturbed attention whores gaining public sympathy. But to tell you the truth, I'm genuinely not feeling the affirmative. I'm actually happy. Everything is just falling perfectly into place right now. But I fear that if happiness is slowly making me loose the artist in me, I wouldn't really want to be this happy. Because I want to imagine it all myself when I'm not under utopia. It is making me myopic every passing day for I'm deprived of that vision that I crave and manifest on my canvas, not in my real life. Everything I would want to imagine is being given to me well processed, only to digest. And sadly I'm digesting it without having any input. My teacher once told me that an artist is never happy. I never thought I'd agree to it until now when I'm finally in the trance of sheer ecstasy. It's like my catharsis was meant to be the climax of a Disney princess movie. How beautifully sly of joy.

On the upside, my instincts are sharp and tell me that my statistics are about to topple a bit. :) And that little gut churning omen is alleviating, really.

I missed this in me.

Choices.

2010-10-28T04:45:00.002+05:00

It is you who makes it. It is you breaks it.

15 rupai ka Dollar pointer FTW!

^_^

2010-10-18T22:03:00.002+05:00

I are the backs, after right short break.

DG's esoteric antics. xD

2010-05-07T20:08:00.001+05:00

Abbas Moiz
actually i'm an anarchist zombiephile, or anything else which gives me an excuse to watch the world burn- and this is just a birthday card xP

Bushra Akram
ZombiePHILE. Holy eff! That's a highly disturbed schizophrenic practice to imagine. >.>

Abbas Moiz
well its more animated than necrophiling =P

Bushra Akram
Yes well I refuse to imagine. >.> you pervert.

Abbas Moiz
\m/ right and i meant phile as in the linguistic sense as in love, ei zombie lover and not .... so whose the pervert now? xD

Bushra Akram
EXCUSE me. So you're calling every baby lover a PEDOPHILE?! HAHA! Don't.

Abbas Moiz
in effect x) ya! u have a more positive outlook on thinks..and more precise i hope

Bushra Akram
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! No I just assumed it. I relate facts with facts. :P Except if I have to make a dictionary on my own. I would simply love to add this invented definition of yours. xD And give you credit of course!

Abbas Moiz
Yamna's def of rape,
and my def of phile,
things seem to be stacking up well for that dictionary of urs

Bushra Akram
Oh I'm really thinking of stacking up words I recently distorted and make it a blogpost. But after exams. speaking of which. I shall out now

Abbas Moiz
u are excused

This HAD to happen now.

2010-05-02T23:48:00.017+05:00

The past month couldn't be a better definition for the word "Futile" as it flushes every single decent plan I made down the potty ki naali.

Seriously, screw you Webster's dictionary. I are making making a thesaurus of my own. Yeah and I'll publish it as.

"As speaketh' and meaneth' the Llama follower"

[Now wouldn't this baby make an epic cover?] This entity can describe my angst PERFECTLY!

So anyway, my mind has been completely contorted by equations, definitions, anxiety, pressure and domestic immigration crisis as I make trips like a philistine gypsy from my grandma's to my mom's and back every day due to WATER crisis. Now the MQM's unit no. I - don't - give - a - fuck union at my mom's apartments are really worth being run over by a bus. Not only is it irritating to have water filling up our tiny apartment tankees [that btw, reach their paucity benchmark in the first 15 hours] to come after 2 whole days. But it is aggravated further when I'm trying to study in a home hit by sporadic periods of load shedding, walls radiating heat and three brothers sodden in sweat and stinking their Lymphs out [reason aforementioned ^] and shouting/arguing/ranting/pulling each other hair and what not. So I have to cancel my plans of the study induced rehabilitation program under mom and end up at grandma. And then am called back because apparently, mother dearest doesn't want my last year's story to repeat again. Whattay life.

Plus, now my intractable situation has further worsened as my mock result is coming on my birthday. Yes I'm failing, and NO, my family won't spare me just because I'll turn a year a older. On the plus side, I treat birthdays like any other day so it wouldn't come down as hard on me as the intensity of self-pity will be lowered. But I wish my family didn't. I just loathe abhor, detest, despise this time of the year. June please come soon. In fact, Uni please come.. Sooner. And yes XM it's a verbose paragraph full of redundancies. I want to be as verbose as possible. I refuse to conform to the inequitable rules of the CIE. This system is nothing but a money making machine with a big bother indoctrinating us with dreams of being Bill Gates when we'll all end up under another economic fiasco and then die. I mean their grading must be a short term they use to practice mass mockery with added hierarchy.

A(a): Ass (always)
B(b): brazen (butt cheek)
C(c): Chaaiwalay (cheeni kam)
D(d): Daruwaalay (do beeri bhi)
E...

Oh you know what I mean. That's what they regard us as. It's all an illusion I tell ya. The world is coming to an end!

But I'll die on the fifth anyway. [Reason aforementioned. Again^].

- Bushra Akram

5th May 1991 -5th May 2010.

PS. After my death, if someone wishes to plagiarize my idea of a llama follower's dictionary. I advise that He/She/it/llama use this as the picture of the back cover and a put a label. KISS MY ARSE!

Mu@hxXxX!^

Ignorance.

2010-04-08T13:31:00.001+05:00

I think I'll pass. After all, you know it better than I do. -cough-

Zombie Che Guevara. :'(

2010-03-30T22:28:00.003+05:00

I now know what I want for my birthday. Like what I REAAALLLY want for my birthday. Is THIS printed on a black T-shirt. T.T

Big pimple : Yellow puss.

2010-03-27T17:26:00.004+05:00

We all know that everything in the current Pakistani system is pretty banged up.

...PAUSE!

Rhetoric; when was it NOT? But out of it all, I was bemused and found it really funny that the "protests" by the matriculation student body in order to demur the decision of postponing the examinations by the lax Sindh Board were nothing more than bhangras and smiling faces in front of the camera. Even the more haughty of the lot who broke in the examination centers to break stuff first made sure that they were having their 2 seconds of fame on national television and then desecrated a already worn out chair/table/fan. Which was, by the way, quite ironic in its context since they were EDUCATED adolescents protesting against the notable negligence of the system upon failing to provide ID cards and wasting students time that could be invested in learning. And the students respond BY destroying government property and wasting resources and their time that they could, Au contraire, spare to prepare for the next exam.

It was quite a cute attempt by them little ones. Especially when they were pushing each other to spot on right in front of the camera with their desperate attempts to make exasperated expressions on their face, which by the way, they failed to do so. Heh. Ha. Hahahahaha. Okay I seriously can't stop laughing. It was such an "AWWWWW" moment. :3

With this aside. I lost much respect for APC. They completely distorted John Lennon's version of "imagine" into art that, instead of coming from an optimistic and relaxed belief much like dear Lennon's, seems to be coming from an abysmal of hopelessness. And the acoustics are sadly downright pathetic. Screw notions of originality here. Blah.

Anyway, Today everyone, willingly and unwillingly in our country shall celebrate Earth Hour, yay! For once the Pakistani Govt. Did something clever. >) Oh and the post title refers to something you do not want to know, dear readers. No, it isn't just about a pimple FYI. It's much much worse. Now loose your sleep over this.

Edit: Oh so Pakistani Government wasn't that smart after all. Anyway, proud to have been part of it all! Rock on Earth! \m/

Out!

Charrrlie. xD

2010-03-21T00:52:00.002+05:00

Revival.

2010-03-19T21:55:00.004+05:00

So they make a public holiday in remembrance of Peer Pagara's FATHER'S death anniversary. What the Dung?! Pagara himself is in his fuckin' sick-soon-to-be-deathbed!

On a more fucked up subject. I'm so screwing my S1 mock. Hallelujah! -_- And S1 isn't easy if you don't know an electron of it. Mind you.

And the revival in the post's the title pertains to the revival of my foul mouth.

Out!

Where's the Kaboom? Seriously, where?

2010-03-15T16:07:00.000+05:00

Nope, nah. In no way is letting the crescendo of writer blocks gonna help my page refresh with some new wordy grub.

So How about I start off by ranting about something that would probably be lame for you my dear readers but for me, it was a complete heart break. All those 5 years of bondage and friendship, its help growing me into a body of calcium and bones. [Authors Quantitative ratio of calcium to flesh: 1,000,000,000]. Its invigorating ceramic company in dreary winter nights when it purveyed caffeine in my veins. The thick rim of its mouth with shiny yellow and blue walls. The protruding figurine of an anxious Marvin the Martian and the words that never failed to meet my eye whenever I held it. "Where's the Kaboom?"

Yes, you may have all guessed I'm talking about my darling mug. I bought it on my trip to Thailand back when I was grade 8th, after my ex owl mug succumbed to my aunt's furor. And to this day I keep on mentioning this to her. But this mug was different. I used it to consume every liquid I could take in: water, milk, coke, coffee, tea, sprite yada yada yada. Who knew today would be the harrowing day when my puritanical way of washing this thing with the first round of soap, second of Max surf and another 3rd round of soap would slip it out of my hands and break it. Sad part is I can't even blame anyone but me.

RIP, where's the kaboom, may your broken parts be treated kindly.

Well, actually not, I have saved them and carefully wrapped them in a newspaper. Was hard to just throw it like that. But I'll miss it anyway.

Disclaimer: No melodrama was intended, all emotions are purely genuine and for anyone who thinks it's just attention whoring, the author suggests that he has his first experience as a zoophile by grabbing his cat and venting out his prostate steam.

-out!-

:\

2010-02-28T01:04:00.002+05:00

I MUST eat and put on some flesh.

But I already worship the former, I tell you. -_-

Photo courtesy: Abbas Moiz.

I b3c0m3Z f@nz.

2010-02-21T12:17:00.005+05:00

Dublew. Tee. Eff!
Yup, World wide Cerebral holocaust. Facebook's ultimate diabolical plan.

Randomz0rz. [Blasts' aftermath]

2010-02-06T09:49:00.006+05:00

I saw myself holding that 25 kg bomb and running away as if it were my baby from a Tyrannosaurus Rex at Jinnah hospital. Whattay Nightmare.

PS: If communism means no allowance, then I'd gladly defy that system. Or not.. Stupid Pakistani democracy, didn't my brains have enough menacing conundrums?

SIUT.

2010-02-02T23:23:00.002+05:00

:]

2010-01-24T14:15:00.003+05:00

Winter's reaching it's generally disliked climax. And why wouldn't it be scarred? It's the only bearable season throughout the year in a city like Karachi. I'll, for the next 9 months, miss how my hands get completely frozen and numb, it feels as if you had them amputated and fixed iced there instead. Sad part is no one is willing to warm them up for me. The good side to is that I am not one of the people in Haiti under concrete rubble. Sad part is it is depressing to see thousands of people still buried under the wreckage, homeless and dead. Good side to it is I'm warding off this pathetic feeling by volunteer work at SIUT. Fuck the certificate, the feeling of doing something for the destitute is much better. Ah. SIUT..

Yesterday I met kids in the Pediatrics' wards and while interacting with them and indulging with them in activities like colouring, story telling, dough molding and singing, I found it commendable that these little souls are far more brave than us. Because it was easy to make them smile with the colour pencils and art books. And those smiles were not fabricated, they were genuine despite the severity of the diseases they contracted. Be grateful for the perfect you, readers.

Oh well.

As for my nocturnal behavior, I'm done with it for now with the climax of this fall. It only works in winters.

Speaking of Climax, I noticed I that always smile at the ending sentence of any novel I read; whether the ending is expected or unexpected. Do you? :)

Excerpt.

2010-01-17T16:17:00.001+05:00

Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.

These passions, like great winds, have blown me hither and thither, in a wayward course, over a deep ocean of anguish, reaching to the very verge of despair.

I have sought love, first, because it brings ecstasy - ecstasy so great that I would often have sacrificed all the rest of life for a few hours of this joy. I have sought it, next, because it relieves loneliness - that terrible loneliness in which one shivering consciousness looks over the rim of the world into the cold unfathomable lifeless abyss. I have sought it, finally, because in the union of love I have seen, in a mystic miniature, the prefiguring vision of the heaven that the saints and poets have imagined. This is what I sought and, though it might seem too good for human life, this is what - at last - I have found.

With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway above the flux. A little of this, but not much, I have achieved.
Love and knowledge, so far as they were possible, led upward toward the heavens. But always pity brought me to earth. Echoes of cries of pain reverberate in my heart. Children in famine, victims tortured by oppressors, helpless old people a hated burden to their sons, and the whole world of loneliness, poverty, and pain make a mockery of what human life should be. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer.

This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly live it again if the chance were offered me.

- Bertand Russel.

Laado.

2010-01-09T21:28:00.002+05:00

Maamoo khubsoorti kay mujasmon ki tasweer kashi karta hai.
Bachi available hai, pata lo.

Blorgasm 5:45 am.

2010-01-07T05:45:00.006+05:00

So, it's around [check the title, squirt] and I'm not high on caffeine, no sir. Actually, I only had 3 cups of coffee since the start of fall. Yes, I know very OMGWTF it is.

What the heck is up with people jabbering and flaunting in your face about how they've only managed to travel in a Omg ewww, gross! Rickshaw for the first time and have never travelled in a rotten public bus?!

Trust me, I feel jeering pity for these poor souls. I don't cynically interrogate people traveling in their Prado's, Lancer's and SUV's [if they exist in Karachi] with a driver. Comfort should be one's priority but I see no point in them being so proud of not adapting to a more normal lifestyle and then casting shitty remarks right in front of you about how "mediocre and disgusting" a local D-7 is and how the pathan's sweat doesn't really suit their noses that are relishing half a bottle of Elizabeth Arden every hour. And no, I'm not exaggerating because I really have found people saying that. I say, one day when these will be stuck without a cellphone in an unknown area in Banaras with their messed up car and no way to contact their millionaire Daddykins . I suppose then, in such despondence, shall they learn the true value of the "Mediocre conveyance" But wait, they won't even know which bus takes the route to where. Hah! Chaching! Who's being pranced upon now?

Okay perhaps this was a little too harsh because there are people who can't experiences the joys of a Rickshaw or a public bus due to paranoia that circumvents them and their families.

But seriously, I suggest that one living in Pakistan should really get used to traveling in public transportation. I do it all the time and believe me.. If there is a douchebag chambeli teil ready to grapple your arse, all you have to is just slap that wanker and spray a tirade of abuses in his face. In fact use the best of your vocabulary and even invent some invectives of your own. Believe me son, they've the weakest souls that take our ugliest faces as juggernauts that might just kill them with shame. But such incidents are rarely encountered.

Also, Public buses are really amusing. You get interminable pashtun entertainment. Ranging from khattak music from Hunza to the cheap porn lyrics of songs from the red light area of Peshawar. And not only do you get to listen to porn but you also get to view free porno for the 10 minute ride as part of the package. Like explicit breastfeeding in the front compartment for all to see. Okay, so it's okay [I guess] to breastfeed a crying child but do ya HAVE to lactate without hiding it all? And that too right in front of the men with raging testosterone?! And the stench really isn't that bad once you get to used to it. Sure it maybe a mixture of 738578657475652545 days old clothes drenched in the signature pathan sweat along with the memento of excrement at every pit stop at sohrab goath. But it really isn't that bad.

And traveling in public transportation doesn't make you brave. It only makes you a well adapted Pakistani.

Ps. No Ethnic Offenses were intended, I'm a pathan myself yo. Walakhaaa!

Anyway, Happy New year everyone. What are your resolutions? ^_^

Burnt shadows.

2009-12-25T22:18:00.008+05:00

"In Past wars only homes burnt, but this time
Don't be surprised if even loneliness ignites.
In Past wars only homes burnt, but this time
Don't be surprised if shadows ignite."

- Sahir Ludhianvi, Parchaiyaan

The best part of it was the letter in the end. It wasn't imperfect, it made it all even more credible. A perfect gift indeed.

Miscellenea.

2009-12-20T12:17:00.006+05:00

As the mundane, lazy ambiance seeps in, I can only expect a horde of assorted thoughts diffusing in my mind that I feel necessary to sort out in this break; and then to garner another fresh one. I'll just sit in a dim, warm corner and sketch this present denizen world. A world I call "Miscellanea". It won't take long to transmute it all into art. What will would be depicting how much of this world was subconscious and conscious while it resided.

I guess I'll be a hermit comfortable in his shell for a while.

PS: I look like an idiot shit if you read my post within 3 hours after it's posted. And then it's all fine when I edit it.

Computerwala.

2009-12-07T03:30:00.003+05:00

The bland and battered webpage that was left barren and black is ready to be blotted by yours truly after a month. Reason being the persistent stay of my beloved CPU at the laziest workstore. It has been almost 3 week since I saw my baby wailing it's circuits out and going in a crescendo of black outs that I had to call my computer "experts"; and by experts I mean retards who've only managed to install corrupt windows and still continued to flicker as my sole hope if any thing good is to become of my Celeron. Now one may ask.

"Why must you adhere to this one notorious bandwagon of unprofessionals, Miss. Akram?"

The answer's simple: Conveyance problem, my family's pressure on me to stop complaining when these "experts" are the closest in reach and must've some degree of experience as indicated by the grandiose display of the shop. [Yup, the "roti kapra and makaan" policy really worked it's way through your heart.] and are actually "Reasonable when it comes to ze green element." [Yes well I hope you adults remember that saying "quality not quantity"].

I really don't trust the whereabouts of the Computerwala's, they only seem to add to the burgeoning problems a poor machine could face. Majorly by bluffing through phones and making up weird complications in the system like.

Computerwala: "Baaji, apka processor or hardrive mein [mumbles some shit to make sure I don't get it] or is k liye to logon ko bulana pare ga."

Me: "Bhai, 2 haftay se tum yehi keh rahay ho, ab kitni der hai?! Bata do kab ayega?"

Computerwala:"Bhai problem ye hai.."

Me: "Abhi to batayee thi tumney problem? Mein ye pooch rahi hun ayega kab?"

Computerwala: "[mumbles some more] apka data urr sakta hai saara D,E,F drive mein, hum koshish kar rahay hain abhi 5 din taqreeban lagein gay."

HeartattackPanicCrashingGlass! :|

No, No NOOO! I had my most meticulously selected songs that I had been downloading since 2006, thousands of memorable photographs ranging from those scanned from the analog Yashica to the D60. All my e-books, my chat history's, downloaded pictures, programs.. EVERYTHING THAT EVER MADE ME HAPPY.. Gone, like -poof-. I was too digitally destitute an invalid to care about blogging despite Computerwala lending me his naked CPU till he got mine fixed. Since it's only the intuition of being back to square one depressing me, I still come to the greener patch of the wretched situation by keeping my fingers crossed. Pray for this poor soul people.

A lot happened in the past month which is too much to fill in at 4 am and I'm terribly sleepy. I'll update this blog regularly to narrate the 30 day chronicles. Till then be happy, be caffeinated, enjoy the winters and be digitalle.

Fika fika fikuh WORD! Umm, yeah, kthxbai.

Chai.

2009-11-07T12:14:00.002+05:00

This is going to be my fourth cup, no wait, MUGGA of tea since 4 am. With only one chapter of bio covered.
Maasi museebatein procrastination is.

Ghost of the sun.

2009-11-06T03:37:00.002+05:00

The thin darkness here
Not strong enough to make you appear
I once changed my style
When they said hello I said goodbye
I once played a role
I was out there marketing my soul
The city of glass that I live in
The coldness from my brothers skin

I trusted you you lied
It's all I hear a fucking lie
I don't give a shit it's over now
It's all I know you broke the vow

Truth is I have seen it come

Seen the ghost of the sun
Can't have it undone
In time we all call out for relief
See two lovers meet
Pass you on the street

Shikra!

2009-11-02T22:58:00.001+05:00

Aala! Inspirational!

Aye haye.

2009-11-01T21:35:00.004+05:00

We all suck at describing ourselves. Especially in 200 words. Look at me I'm this. =_= I had to write a stupid essay on this topic for ifpPakistan '09. It's like an emo ending to some cheap ass super hero movie. Boo. Here it goes. -Ahem-

"Describing one’s self, easy as it may seem, proves to be a complete contrast of the former assumption. In fact, for most individuals, probing their layers of personality and then further compressing it in three words is an impossible task. And I’m one of those people. Because I am like any other person: an amalgamation of a myriad of traits.

But since I have to perform this much challenging task for the essay, I selected the three words that are an irreparable certitude of my being.

The most incontrovertible word to downright describe me would be “Reckless”. I’m, by far, the most boisterously careless teenager you’ll ever stumble upon. And believe me, this isn’t an appreciable ascription at all. Because my carefree behavior has caused periods of gust and turbulence in the oceans that curb people’s lives, including mine. It’s a workaday story in my case to do something very foolhardy spanning from failing to read what that question in the math test actually meant, to almost missing the flight to Malaysia because I left the ticket in my bedroom. Yes, it’s that frequent.

Another word that can flat out neutralize the aforementioned bad impression I might have left on the reader would be the word “Artist”. I’m an ardent dreamer with a mind in which assorted thoughts and ideas form a nexus with a strange urge to be reincarnated into decent prose or photography, in particular the latter. They’re, at best, reflections of the humdrum occupying my head that correlate it perfectly with the beauty of nature, people, places, still life etc. And I’m proud to be one who is able to have this creative side.

And the best to sum it all up, I’m a “me”. Human nature cannot possibly be described in just 3 words. Heck, there can never be an end to this saga. Even I have not a definite idea of who Bushra Akram really is. All I can say is that I'm a human in making. Experiences mold me into a new person every time. But no Xerox of me can ever exist, that I know for sure.

The end."

It's what I do. -says it in a heroic posture with a raised chest and spidey accent and chaddi on the outside- NO you Mofu, I know you're smart enough to know spider man has no underwear issues, I am NOT spidey. I'm, at present an asswipe peeli chaddi wala Bush man. Let's all do the awami pelvic thrusts.. Or not.

Out!

FML.

2009-10-31T18:02:00.005+06:00

Damn! I was just going through my recent posts and realized that firstly, I'm being a lazy numb skull who isn't updating the black 5'10 germ-infested page with tad bit vibrancy. And secondly, even if I do update it, it's with some pictures I find amusing rather than publishing my whacked out opinions on what's actually is happening around me.

There is a single answer to the aforementioned statements. I don't have a life. As if facebook hadn't been sucking life out of me enough.. Even after deactivating, it has made no difference to the monochromatic lifestyle I'm having recently. I mean mayn, I miss those days when some unusual stuff used to happen every other day that gave me orgasms to muse about it on the web.. But now I'm left with nothing but books and tea and a cell phone less and to make it worse wait..

-goes to a corner and %^&*&**))((_)(_)*^$%#$#$%$%^^%&^%#@%&(%%$%$%$%#$##!@$%^%$-

Phew, that felt much better.. oh yeah a CAMERA LESS life. [Aunt took it till December, long atory] I've even got boring for people `cause y'know, the most exciting thing that can happen in the very monotonous life of Ze Bushra Akram is "Food". For example quoting the few "conversations" I had with mates on phone or in college or where ever.

Person: So what's up?
Me: I'm so hungry. Kal mainay matar chawal khaye, aur us k aglay din aaloo gosht.
Person: ....

Or

Me: -jumping onto some person- Yar kal ka pizza hut ka salad antthh tha. ^_^
Person: Err... O_o

And another one.

Me: Yar Subway gaye ho?
Person: Duh kyun?
Me: Sandwiches wahan k achay hotay hain. :|
Person: [About to do what I despise from the abysmal of my heart] Ooookay.

So yes, you can imagine. And I've also developed this irritating habit of repeating one thing for days and days and days, thinking that it maybe the first time I might have actually sparked an interesting subject to speak on... Especially on me entering college sore eyed and sleepless with a story of how I was deprived of this heavenly entity because my grandpa had got the floor polished for the first time in 20 years since we shifted to this house and called for emergency spring cleaning at 8 in the evening. With the entire house covered in white dust... HOLY shit! I repeated it again. Well, epic fail.

It's not a writer's block. My situation is more like that I want to write but have nothing to write on. In short, nothings new. FML.

Deja vu.

2009-10-25T02:06:00.011+06:00

I like the pre winter all nighter[s] that I pull off with Caffeine, Music, and Course books. Especially that feeling of deja vu.. Nothing beats that.
Y'know, the kind which streams off in your veins a concoction of perfect zeroes, memories, oranges of autumn and the feeling of inhaling drugs that waver freely in the air.
Yeah, quite like that. I love it.
Enjoy SAT-ing And Retaking people. And all the best to people who are resting in Dubai. Kick arse in the interview!

Random.

2009-10-24T19:59:00.006+06:00

I draw hot face book graffiti, yes?

My grandpa is watching a "Jonas Brothers" serial in the next room. Seriously, what is the world coming to.
:|

Nothing new.

2009-10-22T19:49:00.010+06:00

Day before yesterday, I heard the news of the suicide attack in Islamic University. Why, all thanks to the self proclaimed "Righteous" clan. Fresh as it was, the news till then could report 1 death but the innate attempts of claiming to be the exclusive media sources to reach the news out to public kept coveting the main headlines nonetheless.

I was at the dentist with assorted tools in my mouth but one thought in my mind. "Great... so these so called mavericks do it again." Indifference, much? Yes, indifference; it's an everyday story. Even if you write about how much condemn this brutal upraise spreading like an epidemic and crumbling the nation to shards, it's still going to be nothing new.

After 3 hours, I got to hear that the government forebode students of the possibilities of their institutions being target of the Extremist hairy dickheads and called for a 4 day off, along with the obvious increase in death toll as more corpses were discovered. Obviously, isn't that a "Mere" part of what this churlish breed wanted? If they found taking innocent lives at a market place a cliche, they turned to something more satisfying for their blood lust - Schools and soon they will be bored of this, they'll turn to babies' carriages. Who says they're brainwashed? This is more of humanity being completely eradicated. They find it more of a game now. As if Counter Strike wasn't fun.

I really am bored of cursing them. Arms please. No it isn't something to make fun of, that's the only practical way left. Pen is mightier than the sword isn't the case here. Been there, done that.

One a much more dental subject, my mum is hell bent on getting my braces off by the end of November. I've been having these babies since grade 8Th and I'm in love with them. I always thought of them as jewels for my teeth. I don't want to get them off. Meh. I'll keep them as souvenirs just like the teeth I kept when I got them pulled off. =_=

And I'm sick of people comparing me with Tapu Javeri or Amean J.[?] `cause awesome they may be for them or maybe they're the only decent photographers in Pakistan. I'm nothing like them, my genre diverges to the south of their north. Plus they are all drowning in the nonpareils of camera gear while I have just one lens, one camera body and whatever is in the house as my subject. So much for Javeri now, is it?

I wanna be the next Erwit or Karsh yaar. ._.

What is art?

2009-10-17T01:05:00.002+06:00

"The feelings with which the artist infects others may be most various - very strong or very weak, very important or very insignificant, very bad or very good: feelings of love for one's own country, self-devotion and submission to fate or to God expressed in a drama, raptures of lovers described in a novel, feelings of voluptuousness expressed in a picture, courage expressed in a triumphal march, merriment evoked by a dance, humor evoked by a funny story, the feeling of quietness transmitted by an evening landscape or by a lullaby, or the feeling of admiration evoked by a beautiful arabesque - it is all art." - Leo Tolstoy.

Perfect, really.

Indeed.

2009-10-07T23:41:00.004+06:00

Honey, it isn't your fault.
You're looking from a third person's perspective, after all. :)

MKB Part II

2009-09-23T03:41:00.014+06:00

For those who don't know what chaff I'm gonna enlighten you on.. Please refer to the post below.

Now I didn't publish all the guesses because I'm through with anonymous dickheads leaving a myriad of disgusting, vulgar interpretations. Sicker than the word MKB [dhum dhum dhuummm]. I wonder where do you get this inordinate swear vocabulary?

But some of the definitions were too good.

Main kehti hun Bush
Madagascar ka Banana
Multan ki bachia
Mano ki billi
Munday ka bullah
Manhoos ko bulao
Moltyfoam ka banaras
Maan ka beta
Munjho kaka bholiro
Maasi ka batwa
Meera kaali bisexual
Maamoo ki baraat

Aaand so on. Obviously all of them are not even near to the MKB I was talking about. This MKB's a bit different. It has been an element of much mystery among the female population of my college, the bro code among our maila gay pride and a phillipic title that is bequeathed every year to one person for God knows what reason. It's a "Maa ka bhonsra". I remember how I, back in first year got befuddled at this code word when the dudes used to talk about last years so called MKB. And upon any curiosity infested query got the same boring bloody "Naahh, you're a girl" reply and periodic I-know-it-and-you-don't smirks. But I've my ways of finding it out, I'm a khocha after all. >)

Now firstly, why the fuck is every personified swear word based on women? No really. Mother fucker, sister fucker, bitch, slut yada yada. And then why are women kept on parochial exposure to this dirt? I find it rather ironic, if such assholes can give women the guts to be ascribed these "hard core" characteristics, then why think of them as delicate flowers; gutless to even digest hearing these words? And on top of that, why the heck would people gasp with their eyes ready pop out seeing a girl calling out BC MC publicly where as, when a guy says it, it's so perfectly normal? No matter how much one claims to be against gender disparity, he shows it somewhere.. Stoopid people!

Coming back to MKB, this has been the title that is being to given to the "special" someones for the past few years by the student body in my college just because their flaws are more evident than of those who keep theirs disguised under a layer of plastic and of course, of the conformist social butterflies who tag along just because.. "Oh Em Gee, everyone like, sssoo hates hemmm so I've to like totally hate him too, totally.." Seriously, get a life. And if you don't want to, then here's the perfect remedy bitch, look at yourself in the mirror and all your obnoxious glory and see that filth that bathes you. But I guess you'd rather anal probe a boar than actually do that if it's the last thing you do.

And then of course, the girl Patricians can simply follow this post to get the mystery of the MKB revealed to them and become aware of the behind the scenes. Now there shall be no more questions about what is MKB and femmehz can simply gawk and shut up in college. So I'm generally doing them a favor. Yus! And Patricians can come up with a better title. This one's gonna get old anyway! ^^

Go ahead, mate. Pop out your eye balls right into your sheer khurma because a girrrlll said it. Pfft.

-Out!-

The MKB mystery. Part I

2009-09-18T23:07:00.003+06:00

MKB stands for?

You answer, details in the next post juxtaposed with rambling, fun, bitchiness, pseudo-intellectuality, awami-ness[?], brotherly love and the inside jokes of Patrician hood.

Ps: Any answer given by a patrician shall be terminated. ^^

And yes, you mofu, I'm a GIRL writing this. >]

Let yo guesses begin!

2009-09-11T23:39:00.006+06:00

A part of it is always there and it says it all.

Ps: Only the PP is done by yours truly. Photo taken by my best friend. Thanks!

I..

2009-09-06T19:40:00.004+06:00

Desperately,

desperately,

DESPERATELY

Need my hair cut seriously short.

._.

Pointless.

2009-09-01T21:58:00.004+06:00

Well, it's been quite a while since I posted anything...

And it's not like I'm struck with any resplendent ideas thanks to the prevalent humdrum these days. Make it stop someone. -_-

But I'm in serious emo mode so I shall stuff thee with my crap. Okay, the past 20 days have been an interim of freakin' blows one after the other. Not surprisingly all of them were tied the post AS result blues. All thanks to me for getting such awesome grades that will make my dream universities come begging at my doorstep to study there and do the Harvard walk of fame [it exists right?] But I'm just too cool for zem. -snaps- So I'm just going to limit my University preferences from AKU being my top priority followed by DAA. [DOW,. Dayem! I hate that place]. And I do hope, my dear readers that you observe the irony I've stuffed in.

Point is, I fucked my grades big time. Now THIS, automatically gives my mom and my much concerned [no, really] khala a chance to reminisce how impetuous was my idea of taking the SAT during the first half of my AS and that's what I get a lecture on, a very strong one, almost everyday. But oh well, at least this made me realize that I must never make a decision on my own. Yes, I, Bushra Akram, 18.33 year old is as dependent as a baby who's gonna end up all bones with the malnourished people in Africa at the end of her photography trip because she was cursed with the don't listen to mum and end up nowhere" pathogen. Sheesh.

Okay enough of that, the bright side of it all was that even if I did apply for a foreign university chances that I would've gone there were minuscule. Because neither do I have a single relative or any known person who would be of some help if I stayed there and even if I were to get in on scholarship my paranoid mother who always had a lot of doubt about me being in my right mind would've given the "no" at the main event.

So staying here I am. Which I'm sure you won't have any interest in knowing and I just pointlessly rambled. :\

And, I lost more weight, Every one thinks I'm seriously turning out tobe anorexic. Do 24 completely food deprived hours between iftars count?

Oh and I also realized my pre result fever. I had so much of CIE going on in my mind that when I wrote about the bug in Present education I wrote "CIE of a huge ass company" When it was actually CEO. I should proof read my posts. I feel like a looser right now. -sigh-

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/wales/8232250.stm

Wtf?

Out!

Devastated.

2009-08-13T03:30:00.002+06:00

British-shit
Bull-shit
Cow-shit
Dog-shit

There you go, am out till I fix it up.
After all, the night IS the darkest before the dawn.

Weddings are boring..

2009-08-03T22:11:00.005+06:00

So we ended up doing this. ^^ Wedding zombies.

Right?

2009-08-03T03:38:00.007+06:00

I realized that our education system is to some.. okay to a very HUGE extent, susceptible to the self contradictory methods of the board. And I'm not talking from the point of the wide spread bribery blatantly practiced in the Federal and Sindh in order to aggrandize the grades and accredit merit to the students when they didn't deserve it; but I'm actually speaking on behalf of the the curtains being pulled over the "Chemistry" we learned back in O'levels.

Yes Mr. Breetish Asses, I'm accusing you guys.

I was suddenly hit by how my chemistry tutor put it few months back. Sure we've learned that the atom was nothing but a mass of simple orbits round a nucleus with electrons moving. But while learning the intuition of bonding in the AS, much of the stuff he explained clearly contradicted what was taught last year. And when argued thanks to the to the meddling confusion by the tennis match in the mind. All he said was.

"You find this confusing eh? What you were taught in O's was trash and you'll later come to realization that what you learned in AS level was also trash. Because this is nothing but a dystopic fragment of the vast chemistry that the great men discovered."

And all it did was make me wonder about how wrong were our teachers when they said that "Education is useless unless grasped and embedded in the mind for the future use rather than temporarily acquired just to grab those glittery grades and then long forgotten."

I don't think I'd liked to be fooled with such education that's nothing but delusion. Okay so maybe in the case of chemistry. Still, I'd go for the latter part of the aforementioned statement in this case. But here I go raving about my forced educational cum social conformity nonetheless. Have to follow the general mindset because my mum herself is siding it since she happens to one of those people who look at the small, usual and unfortunately, the most popular career scope.

Daactar, CEO of a huge ass company, pailaet.

Sucks.

I so wanna be a photographer now.

Oh on a much more bloggy note. It seems like the wave of a writer's block swaps away all us writers at the same time eh? Okay enough dead. Resurrect! Oh, and next Monday is the result. And it's the antithesis of what I felt last year. I'm not petrified at all. Wtf? Something is wrong. Oh shit, I'm going sane?! D: No moar saniteh plz! =_________="

Welcome to Pats, babeh!

2009-07-23T21:22:00.011+06:00

Along with the excellent facilities my dear college provides, it has expanded those incentives [by improvising from the water thanks to the recent rainfall] to not only humans but...

You may get the point by now. ^^
Congrats to all patricians for the the new lake!
Special thanks to Siyab for snoring while I stole his photos.

=_=

2009-07-21T20:55:00.005+06:00

I think I can survive with load shedding.

But it ain't fun when there's actually electricity but no water to wash your face with. Not because the motor got screwed but because we ran out of water supply for the next 2 days. I'm feeling really thirsty but out of the fear of peeing I am not gonna go near that dispenser. Don't want to wash with water filled in bottles 1.5 liter Pepsi bottles.

It sucks. Tanki, yar bhar jao. Please. Please?

And then it rained..

2009-07-20T03:45:00.002+06:00

I don't know what the heck is that people find so monumental about rain. Even when the impending session takes place like it did few days back; people just couldn’t keep their fingers from updating their facebook statuses like:

"Omg, its raining, YAY"

or

"ohx wowx itx raaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiinx .. !!!"

or

“**~r@1n Br!nGz 0uTzz @Tt!tud3zZzzXxX~**"

And such retina tearing language too 100 times a day whenever you open the facebook homepage. Or you get a text every now and then and then repetitive of the monsoon season that makes, at least me, shove it in their face that BITCH, I KNOW. I can see the weather's not really bringing the usual incandescent afternoon and there’s slight drizzling, yeah. What’s so great about it? And it’s only the inception of yet another murky ambiance in Karachi where approximately 8 people die because of the already fucked up conditions of the cheap wiring thanks to KESC that break off finally because of heavy raining. [As if the 12 hours of load shedding weren’t really enough.] And of course, proclivity of our local gutters can make it only worse, surging out rain water mixed with that of the sewer that eventually gushes on the streets of the city.

Okay, so that’s just the resentment almost every Karachite has to undergo. But the time my family, guests and I had to go through was something more than that. Upon which we, as usual, agreed that Karachi might not be the most suitable place for the rainy season. And obviously my grandfather should listen to us for once on making a marble barrier between the terrace and the interior.

Yesterday, we ended up having a family dawat, Yes, I know, not at all smart. But what were we to do when we were all done with the groceries and our uncle had to leave for ship for another 17 months? Anyway, the party started. Every one was busy chatting their mouths off when it started raining heavily. Okay? Not much of a problem. The event can be pulled off. Apparently, not when your house has a built in waterfall down the stairs due to flow from the terrace in the lounge. That’s when my aunt started to fret and I went to the flooded backyard and found just one bloody wiper and jhaaroo. Curse the lack of cleaning equipment! That’s when the mayhem starts. Now my grandpa gets a wee bit temperamental when he observes slight turbulence in any party he plans for his son-in-laws and upon seeing half a dozen of my cousins and aunts running upstairs getting newspapers and the others folding their shalwars up and removing the furniture off the lounge floor drenched in muddy water and the rest trying to placate the annoyed guests and gramps. It wasn’t exactly what you call situation to gloat about. It was a fucking quagmire that got on everyone, man!

So, I was handed a big jharroo and there I’m in my casual attire stuffed in my jeans and brushing water off into the veranda.

The problem was temporarily solved and half then the KESC makes a comeback to put the cherry on the already grueling situation and that too at the time of serving the food. The hosts are all busy grabbing candles because our wretched UPS had already given up being all wet. But thanks to the extremely awesome biryani made by Eskay, gave birth to immediate mood swings. Well at least I got happy.

I’ve this thing in me, whenever there is a situation. [shortage of water, dirt in the house, filling up of dishes etc etc] I get restive and tend to act there and then. And my aunt and I make a pretty good team, :D Both of us grab aprons and start washing and drying and placing the dishes back in he drainers and cabinets. Forget the maasi, you dawdling asses. Wash `em now! It’s disgusting how people leave them in the sink cabinet for the next day. –bleckh- So we got the post dawat crap done. But the guests just wouldn’t get their asses and leave for home now, would they? While few of the sensible ones left and passed through the obstructive rain water safely home. the rest decided to stay. DUDE, 7 people in the drawing room, 4 in my beloved room, it’s all dark, Others occupying the rest of the rooms. Lying without pillows, farting all they want, sweating, and asking for more tea. And then there’s an aunt of mine, a rather defamed one, who was served tea that was made in mere candle light with an addition of muddy water on the kitchen floor and all the shit while she and waited like a wild boar. And when her cup was placed when in front of her all she said was.

“Achi chai nahi hai, paani ho rahee hai, tauba”

What the hell izzat supposed to mean?! Why don’t you just fuck off home and make tea yourself. I hate people like her. They do nothing and then complain.

And now it isn’t as cool ranting now as it was before so I’m gonna stop. The point it is. Rain in Karachi and especially on our is nothing but a subversive element that makes a family party look like a pointless retrogressive get together. Oh well. Besides, this whole post was to be posted now but even after 20 hours since the rain stopped and still no connection, posting may incur a I’ve-no-idea-how-many-hours delay.. :/

On a much dental note, it’s been freaking 5 years since I got my braces. But I, being a negligent careless whore got it screwed up again. ^^ But my retainers hurt. =_= Also, mayn is F.B Area one helluva place! No load shedding here. Huzzah? Enjoy 32 hours of glum no bijli atmosphere! Hawhaw!

-out!-

Armageddon? Pfft.. Yeah right.

2009-07-14T19:40:00.006+06:00

21.12.2012. End of time. End of the world. The end of Mayan Long Count. The apocalypse. The end of Kali Yuga. The winter solstice 2012 is not just any solstice but the solstice of all solstices. It is the Great Solstice - a solstice of the precessional or Platonic year. It is the fountain of all solstices and all equinoxes from which the life flows and cascades from a season to season. It is the source from which the time to which we owe our existence gushes out. And it is also a payback time when such existence must be justified. Did the gift of life, which was bestowed the last time around, fulfill its purpose? What does the end date of Mayan Long count indicate? What will happen on 21.12.2012? Will it be what Tom, Harry or Sally thought and put forward in their theories or will it be what it must be? What does this date truly indicate? Is it negotiable? It indicates the end of the present order and it is NOT negotiable. 21.12.2012 is an appointment with destiny. It is an apocalypse and ascension. It is the end of the world, as we know it - nothing more and nothing less. It is a complete and comprehensive destruction of the age of Kali as a dominant force shaping all aspects of life, which is preceding the dawn of a new Golden age. Did not you know that every transformation and establishment of a new order is unfolded through the destruction of the old order? Did not you know that every action must have an equal and opposite reaction? Did not you know that everything that exists must be born and it must die? Did not you know that new life is created through death and death through life? Did you think that you would never die? Did you really think that time is infinite? Well, it doesn't really matter what anyone thought because truth is not affected by such idle theories at least. To think is not to know.

Yeah.. Assumptions made by the mad man freshly released from a disturbing asylum on the streets. To all those who're dumb enough to follow this. Go, shut yourself in a room and save your asses from getting grilled in hell. Haye, Pray Pray. We're all doomed.
Actually the end of the world on our head anyway. Lets just blow up the planet and head for nuclear winters shall we? That'll be one cool way to prove them saints right. Or drill in to quantum physics as a untited force and subsequently give birth to the Big Crunch through morbid wave patterns. Or sit back and on 21.12.12 to send Human fetishist elephants to the "Prophets" of such remarkably influential epiphany that has managed to recruit dumbfucks all over the world. Shit man, get a life.

Psycho-logy.

2009-07-09T16:11:00.005+06:00

You may be familiar with the following experience: Your Mumma, Khala, Phuppo, Nani, Dadi, Dada, Teeechur e.t.c is talking to you and he/she/it says "Are you even paying attention?!". You weren't listening, but REMARKABLY you are able to repeat the last few things he/she/it said. This is because the information is in a sensory memory store, where it is held for a few seconds before entering the short term memory.

Okay so I didn't know that. Perhaps I'm more ignorant than ya'all smartasses.
Still.
Psychology is ohsoverycoolyo!

A little something for YOU, with love. :)

2009-07-06T22:37:00.001+06:00

Rishta Hurtle.

2009-07-03T20:01:00.005+06:00

Y'know, it ALWAYS happens with me. Whenever I point something unusual about someone or their family/neighbors/ etc etc that doesn't normally happen around me or isn't related to me in any aspect. That same shit shows up in my face after few days. This is very depressing.

Oh, how I've always felt proud of my family never being one of those hypochondriacs when it comes to getting their teenaged daughters into those matrimonial hype with rishta auntys and all. Apparently, one person, My bari khala "Biajan" surpassed the terminus of my opinion by finally bluttering in front of my mom.

"Bas Akhtar, Shaista ka nikah ho jaye ga to Bushra ki baari ajayegi. Behan, mein to kehti hun is ki 20 saal main hi shaadi kardein."

Okay PAUSE.

a) Dude, this shit happened again. Sorry to all the blogs and people around me who were facing this before and then being mocked by me secretly.

b) Like bloody hell I'll give up my dream of going to MIT to producing gallons and tons of babies and "Rotian thoping" for my husband and pressing legs of saasu maan.

c) Mum I love you.

My mum is the ONE person in my family pragmatic enough to choose girls being celibate, completing their education and having pre-marital fun over getting involved in the baby manufacture scams at 18-2o years of age. So she refused to the blatant suggestion by saying that she need not worry about me, bohat larkay hain. ^^

So I guess my mum is immune to the get-drenched-in worries ville-due-to-late-rishta disease and knows me well enough. Huzzah? -dances-

Out!

White.

2009-07-01T04:33:00.006+06:00

Milky Slovenian mornings,
Cup me in your sunshine,
Erase those nightmares put forth
By the sleepless mind.
Let me print the whiteness of his shirt
The mug of davidoff, that puff of marijuana
That solitary gaze, that contentment
Oblivious of his half
Sneaking through the curtains
Capturing and jailing him in a dark room
adding another memory
But it wouldn't be a secret, If I told him
Milky Slovenian mornings.
Make my diary, alive again...

Sigh.

2009-06-26T18:28:00.001+06:00

I boredz0rz.
I feel like a twig.

Imprecation of the cousinship - over!

2009-06-25T21:27:00.008+06:00

Gregarious with cousins?

I am not and I will not especially after I discovered a shredded, smashed, broken to pulp cellphone in a cup thanks to the pain-in-the-ass-teen-family-rama I have at my place; and that too at 4:00 am day before yesterday when I was forced to abdicate my perfectly peaceful sleep to yet another rant by these horrible monstrosities in teen bodies. Long story short - J swung M's Narto DVD's to the apartment's parking lot one lane away from our terrace and M broke J's cell phone costing a bloody 18,000 bucks. Upon critical query from M on creating a loss of 18,000 for 250 bucks this was her reaction.

"Baba jani naya laadein gey, waisay bhi kharab tha" :|

Sure, what's the most that's gonna happen? Their daddykins will buy them a new one. Wait, make it an iPhone after an iPod. Or maybe get `em a diamond encrusted one.. Not that I'm jealous or anything, but trust me. Their reaction wanted me to tie them to missiles and fire them to the planet of brain sucking aliens. And since their brain juice will already be filled with "Dah duoh duh" dumbass virus. The wretched race will be wiped off too. So no more evil aliens.

Which will make me a discreet hero. My thinking can take me to places, haha. I pawn! Okay that's not the point.

Point ye hai k meri family main sab sattya gaye hain..

Anyway, The good news for me is that they finally bade farewell yesterday, And now I can relax in my own little bubble of pure mirth and savor the yummy pakoras after another pointless rant. Out!

Bushra ka qeema!

2009-06-19T22:08:00.005+06:00

One small room, MY room, with:

7 destructive, annoying, spoiled teens n' kids ranging from ages 6 to 16.

One PS2, one laptop stuffed in a corner, gazillion Naruto DVDs, One desktop with the only internet access, one guitar, one TV, tables, sofas.

One poor 18 year old who is caught up dealing with 5 of them whining over their turn on the console, two of them hurling out at each other to shut the voices of their damn mp3's so that they can listen to their much comparable playlists, [wtf?!] and in case of total failure getting that typical response from the oldies. "Ap to bari hain Bushra, ap ko to in ko handle karna chahiye tha. No excuses!"

One brain in the grinder.

Room cleaning after every hour.

Help please, please?

PLEASE, I swear I'll be your slave forever and ever and ever.

Of random crap and update on Aamer KPT plumber wala!

2009-06-11T14:02:00.006+06:00

Apparently my plumber man is nothing but an under sized, gray matter lacking chaddi person more than I perceived him to be from the very beginning.

He has officially threatened pops to quit "Flaying" him for no reason or he'll bring home a horde of Talibans.

Talibans?

That's the best you can come up with? YES we ALL know Talibans are THE panacea for all the fucked up situations in the country and hence they shall intrude normal workaday happenings and shall find it utterly devoid of Islamic beliefs to have a mere diatribe with idiot plumber wannabes for taking three days to fix a fuckin' itty bitty "Uper charhaanay waali motor". Yes, for them it shall be equal to the desecration of their red beards with matchsticks. I swear I get orgasms even imagining doing that! [Iwannadoit! Make a virtual game out of it, you!] Beard on fire bitch, lemme at `em!

Point is the much the delusive perception people are starting to have, on how they can protect themselves with such a gorgeous name affiliated with theirs. Taibawns, Talipawrn, Talifawk! And this is none the less a perfect example of optimism. Huzzah?

So If I happen to disappear out of no where; believe that I'm being flogged in a barren old building in some kacchar area. Yeah babeh! And let me give you a description in advance my much expected saviors. He is a daarhi wala insaan with a Bengali accent and asks for hot tea with left over cakes on first meeting. That should do it. Besides what do you expect me to be amused by with days and days of lazing around?

And I was wondering why my blog was a dead man's page. Sorry for the ME ME ME settings. I was pretty much unaware of that stuff. And I'm head over heals with Teardrop - massive attack. It's one mellow track that I can listen to over and over and over. Elizabeth Frasier, do me with your voice. Heh.

Gentle Impulsion
Shakes me makes me lighter
Fearless on my breath
Teardrop on fire
Fearless on my breath

A fucking brilliant video! Like seriously man. :D We all had zat moment. Except that it wasn't so much of a huge space. We were all bloody crammed up in there man. The amniotic fluid was much filled with other "stuff" and we were up side down and we never sang, yo. And maybe if I underwent abortion [being the baby] then there wouldn't be light shit coming from above in the womb man. Anyway, kudos to you mumma.

And please please gimme ideas for some good reads. I'm hooked on to War and peace at ze moment and that will be done with. And Night Rise. Any more cool fight shit, mystery, anti - cheese, anti - corn, pro - rape, pro - gore, pro - philosophical books. Ideas peoples!

-.-

2009-06-11T01:59:00.002+06:00

That's what examinations do to you. They make you look like a fucking Zombie. Munshi was right.
"Get some sleep you deprived person"

Block man.

2009-06-10T18:53:00.005+06:00

Exams were.. I forgot. I control my amnesia. Okay I don't. But don't ask me how they went.

Yes back to blogging. I feel like I've a writer's block. So I'm not thinking normal [which is apparently not thinking straight and being completely sane].

BUT, all I know right now is that my plumber is enjoying his cuppa tea at KPT where as I'm hundreds of kilometers away waiting for the "Uper Chrhaanay waali" motor [yes, it's called THAT in our household vocabulary] to get fixed and you wouldn't have absolutely any interest in knowing the horrendous dehydrated situation our taps are in. And of course, me. After all you people are enjoying purity running off that you can exploit all ya want. Unless, you're in Thar.. Which you're not. OR you've a grandfather who wants to use his KPT retirement advantages to the fullest. Which. you. don't.

So back to the main point I've a writers block. Ye.
Huppy Haalidas!

Update: Phadda of nana with Aamer the pulmber who came approximately 8 hours late than the commitment made! Must watch and participate. HAH!

18 and legal!

2009-05-05T20:16:00.000+06:00

And today I add one to 17.

Heh.

Peace! =D

2009-04-10T01:10:00.002+05:00

Okay, Last post till 11th June. I am blogging off till the end of AS examinations people. I realized that it has been posing much of a distraction and I must and I mean MUST work my ass off. God, I'm so incoherent, I can't even balance my fucking life properly. But now not any more! Just to let you know that. Peace out.

I is outs, till then: Eat, drink, be happy, and live it!

Oh em gee another round of Judas Priest to get the caffeine in me running at 4:00 am. I'll LOVE these days. High A's you better keep yo ass flat `cause Bush is coming to getchya! :DDDDD

And no, fuck yourself, I'm not a nerd! Initiating orgy NOW ending with a happy face of I-had-sex-on-ice-papers!

Bring-it-on!!!

Tata.

Happy blogging.

Mind, Body, and Spirit.

2009-04-07T19:14:00.006+05:00

As above, so below.

As within, so without.
- The Emerald Tablet, circa 3000 BC.

The pages of the book are still fresh with that exotic, out of this world smell.
Thank you very much, princess.
- Indebted.

Hair...

2009-04-06T15:58:00.011+05:00

Everything is so expensive. So Dior. So Jolly Rancher.

Also, apart from dragons and anime chicks. I drew free style emo kids. No offense to any one emo. I just wanted to draw something. But, I do wish my hair were emo, so that they'd cut themselves without me making those freaking visits to the fat aunties at a beauty parlour and saving money instead and along with everything else, getting my favorite Beatles/ Bruce Lee/ Emo-ish Indie cut! -pulls collar-

My sexy hair cut only costs me 250 Rs. HAHA! So much for sitting in pivot point and getting a lousy cut for 1500. You can get the same at any parlour damn it! (H)

Awami. Is. Sex. Okay? And that's how I roll, yo.

Who should we believe?

2009-04-04T07:45:00.008+05:00

So, this dudette called Minillah let media’s hand on the video of a 17 year old girl being flogged/lashed/whipped/physically beaten to pulp by the Taliban for stepping out of the house with this person who was not her husband [ but her father-in-law]. I’m not really going to go on about how much I condemn these acts of utter extremism for the sake of “Dignity” among this clan. But what I can express is that, it’s just one girl that has been aired world wide to be suffering from such atrocities. But isn’t it obvious of how boldly these pseudo-religious cunts put thousands of these innocent souls to misery. I’m actually surprised that the Pakistani government isn’t really doing anything but then again… what can it do? They have millions of problems with them being the foremost of them all.

I guess, I can’t show my grief because it’s not just one… it’s been happening with a whole lot. And All I can do is just write words. And i seriously curse my self for just watching and writing. Rather than getting some fucking ammo with a fucking lot of people and busting their fat bearded faces. I remember a quote form the movie “Khuda k liye”

“Deen main daarhi hoti hai.. magar daarhi main deen nahi hota” Or some thing like this.

May God bless her. A Utopian society is just a dream… A dream that will hardly become animation; and will stay like this with such people on loose. For instance, look at Afghanistan, the law has openly termed rape legal. So we'd expect forced rape of a husband on wife. Not that they're not sexually frustrated in the first place [no ethnic offense intended]. I mean, whoa! It's gonna be man on girl, man on boy, woman on boy, man on woman [insert whoever on whoever]. I'm surprised, like seriously. Who would create such an inhumane system? Society is fucked.

Plus, I was talking to one the best people I know who seriously know how to conjure a good rambling. It's about the secretarial and social hierarchy prevalent among people for a long time. For a Karachite [ascending from the poor to rich order] it's like Malir/Landhi, Nazimabad/Gulshan, Defence/KDA. Now the middle class is stuck between the rich and the poor.

The poor would say, "Be obedient and faithful Or you'll end up like us."

And the rich would say. "You don't need to obedient or faithful to be like us."

Middle due's ultimate reaction. STFUPLZ.

Yeah, Danish. You're a genius. A perfect description.

We're on the verge to finally find a place in the society. Which is in itself an epitome of shit.

On a much more brighter subject. I realized that I should be thankful for not being part of such a conservative, violent atmosphere.

Thank you.

Of the brainless.

2009-04-03T13:33:00.002+05:00

Seeing as to how the days are passing. It affirms the belief in me that the general mindset is mindless. What's worse is that even I'm sometimes a part of it.

And even worse, I don't realize it. Often.
And No, I don't love any of my blogger mates. I like them.
It's pointless, but true.

SAT Video is up!

2009-03-31T20:20:00.001+05:00

Okay so I'm in this video as well. I didn't even know it was for the film festival in college. being me. I was scared! xD

Maak.

2009-03-27T07:38:00.006+05:00

To do in the next 12 hours.

Trigonometry.
Volume of revolution.

Haven't touched mechanics. M1. Dunno shit. Mock tomorrow.

I.am.fucked.
Let the morning rape-dom begin!
I want the competitive me back. :/

Goth

2009-03-25T09:30:00.011+05:00

Apparently I remember I promised to post the goth crap that won me the competition. And yes, it's me.
And I realized wordpress no fun when you can't change colour schemes to black black and black. :/ Sorry for the pout break. I'm back on blogger. I hate blogging on white. No customization, no definition of your self through your page... no anything. =_="
Thawthaw! :D
Please follow my photography if you're interested on
My Flickr

Bitch- my definition. :D

2009-03-20T14:20:00.001+05:00

I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried
You must have been relieved to see
The softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

So take me as I am
This may mean
You'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that
When I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

Just when you think, you got me figured out
The season's already changing
I think it's cool, you do what you do
And don't try to save me

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way

Hacked

2009-03-17T03:44:00.005+05:00

Suckiest start of the day today. I log in to my msn half an hour before heading out of the house and woosh some hacker that has been getting on my nerve for the past month changed my password. So I make a new e-mail. WTF?! SUCKS! Hackers. must. die. Their Genocide should be termed legal. All my favorite contacts were there. =_=” And thanks to my short term memory, I can’t grasp 97% of them. Oh well, starting over and loosing contact.
For those who already have my email address, BLOCK MY OLD ID or DELETE it or whatever!

OF the buzz- Yes we can!

2009-03-14T14:17:00.009+05:00

I won’t say I’m much of a news hogger but while going through other blogs. I found it to be worth noticing and stating my opinion on the the recent news feature by CNN. As if we don’t have enough world issues to cover through the virtual pages; all CNN could think of putting on their main page news feature was The Obamas’ new dog… wait… WHAT THE FUCK?!

I mean think about it, there are a gazillion global issues CNN could flood in their main page with. But wait, why would they even wanna make “superfluous” entries on global hunger, health problems, war, peace, the corrupt politics e.t.c when they have a sleezy first ever black president’s really important dog to kiss ass of? Taha thinks that those are diversionary tactics to entice interest of people and hence get a accreted readership. If it is such gossip and spice, then I believe the next feature to “entice” the gaming orgasm of the world population would be a full length news feature hitting the main page on the development of virtual Gaza on the latest Counter Strike edition so as to give the feeling to the gamer of how is it like experiencing forced almost-genocide whether for the oppressor or the oppressed.

Plus, My friend Asad stated that if Asif Zardari were the potential Dog Obama had, then it’d be so worth putting the news pn the main page. Now Asad, as my view goes, The Dog is too good to be given analogical parallelism to Zardari. Zardari can easily make it to being the ugly pink bitches [chihuahuas] that Paris Hilton drowns in while being at a party orgy.

Oh well, non the less; whether the news proves it or not, Obama is still a magnate. I have a liking for the guy. I was even surprised that he used to live in Gulshan some time back.

And then we see GEO shutting down again. What good does it bring? Sherry Rehman resigning. It's weird y'know, how the political drama pervades and affects the media. Why am I not surprised? also it was funny last night when Aitezaz Ahsan was breaking at this anchor on Express news during a phone chat to stop displaying his picture as he did not want to be part of the debate. LOL, Pakistani politics is getting monotonously dramatic.

Complete.

2009-03-13T21:08:00.002+05:00

I like the college stairs. That’s one place where I can be truly and COMPLETELY… me! And I keep on going there periodically. To be complete once and for all. Not that it lasts long, but I think I can deal with it. All hail no cameras!
Also, I won the photography competition in college. Hopefully, it'll get published in the year book. Theme-Gothic. And no I don't do any plagiarism, my work is a copyright based on my own concept. I'll post a picture of my powdered face with Dehli soorma all smudged in my next post.
Life is love, live it.

Of the Procrastin.

2009-03-10T20:36:00.003+05:00

"Masturbation is like procrastination. It’s funny when you realize that you ended up fucking yourself."
I support profanity, btw. And I refuse to support organic chemistry. NO ORGY FOR ORGY!
-folds legs, raises brow and impersonates a Mafia leader taking a massive drag.-

Yawn.

2009-03-07T02:23:00.002+05:00

I am not updating as my life is what you call... an epitome of monotony and my extension wire manage to bump itself in the socket, so I was no way near my PC. On a much more monotonous subject exam's up, made a mess with people... must go bury head in books. And both my feet are fine [ruptured one, surgery on the other] woot! Till then Chao peoples.
Have a great life.
And Chun Chun: I missed ye thoo.
Pheache! xD

2009-02-21T16:37:00.001+05:00

Forced Silence and Insomnia
Colours, I await thee patiently.

After tea ramble.

2009-02-17T00:29:00.006+05:00

I proceed my ramble here with the word “Kyun” which is ostensibly the favorite word our parents and elders just love to say over anything.
Not only does this word keeps our minor mouths alum-ed but also gives them a cherry to top their incessant lectures that extend for months. [well, at least in my case.]
Every time I come home with a pathetic grade, I don’t think my mom would be considerate enough to listen to my perfectly rational explanation that the teacher made a test that could whack every teenage ass in class. And if I possibly manage to make an attempt [which always goes in vain] to make her understand that no one got a good grade. I always get the perfect counter statement.
“Mujhe auron se matlab nahi, TUMHRAY kyun nahi achay aai?!”
Yar amma ap bhi na. “Mum, kyun k sir k questions bohat mushkil thay meray liya”
“KYUN mushkil thay?!”
And there is my face —> 8|
Adults of today.
And of course, many experiences upon facing the post exam critical queries have engraved in my caffeinated cerebrum that one should always reply to khalas and mums that “Result k din ap ko maaloom ho jaye ga.”
Know why?
Simple, when you go and they hit the first question “how was the paper?” and you accidentally affirm positively you’ll get a deserted reply. “Woh to result k din hi pata chgalay ga”. And then the next time you’re asked and you make a bigger mistake by saying it went pathetic then prepare your exhausted brain for a log chain of KYUNs.
Moral of the story Kids? Either run up to your room after a bad grade/paper/WHATEVERPLZ or just shut up. Save yourselves.

On a much more anatomical subject, I discovered that human body parts can actually be hardened and kept just like that. BOOYAH. -lifts collar- for instance my corn. I have kept it as a fragment of my 17 year old body. xD Now many will eww, but trust me it’s body part yo! You eat cows and goats and all, then it don’t matter? And I also got my premolars I got removed 3 years back. I is teh sax man!
Okay done.
-out!-

I think PERFECTION!

2009-02-14T12:46:00.005+05:00

Most people define themselves by this finite body, but you're not a finite body. Even under the microscope you're an energy field. what we know about energy is this. You go to a quantum physicist and you say, "What creates the world?" And he or she will say, "Energy". Well, describe energy. "OK, it can never be created or destroyed, it always was, always has been, everything that ever existed always exists it's moving into form, through form and out of form.". You go to a theologian and ask the question, "What created the Universe?" And he or she will say , "God." OK, describe God. "Always was and always has been, never can be created or destroyed, all that ever was, always will be, always moving into form, through form and out of form." You see, it's the same description, but just different terminology,

So if you think you're this "Meat suit" running around, think again. You're a spiritual being! You're an energy field, operation in a larger energy field. -James Ray.

There you go.

2009-02-12T19:43:00.002+05:00

Critical reading :560
Writing: 690
Math: 650
Essay: 9/12
1910 S.A.T Score. Yeah, so much for the work.

2009-02-11T16:02:00.002+05:00

Pour your misery down,
pour your misery down on me.

Rows in my mind.

2009-02-10T13:00:00.004+05:00

Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, not those who know much,

who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science.
So....

Man, I blog shit. But blah, that's how my mind sees the world.

We are mailas....

2009-02-08T16:54:00.002+05:00

Trying to be hot.
xD maila is fun man..

APDC. =_="

2009-02-08T16:11:00.005+05:00

I totally wasted yesterday..
I mean think about it; wasting 10 hours at the All Pakistan Declamation contest for no credit whatsoever. I was the photographer of the event, you know, like those Shaadi walay photographers that have this pouch sticking to their pregnant torso and the camera hanging... ye, those ones. And my camera managed to run low on battery in the first round. So I went back to the AV area where the jam sessions were taking place, my buds were busy digging their noses into their respective laptops and I comfortable dozed off on the couch when Masnoon came running towards me with a petrified expression, followed by worth telling conversation.

Masnoon: Bush, come with your camera, I need you.
Me: Why?
Masnoon. There is this dude, from Daily Times who needs you take pictures of the participants,
ME: DON'T TELL ME THEY ARE GONNA BE PUBLISHED IN THE NEWSPAPER. o_O
Masnoon: Ye ye.. that.
Salman: [lying cum sitting] Where you going?
ME: [grinning] to my big break! =D
I run with masnoon to this half gay dude.
Me: Yeah, you wanted...
Masnoon: Ye lo bhai, she can photograph good.
Cheeky newspaper dude: Good, so like can you call all the candidates and take fabulous pictures.
Me: I can but tell me you're gonna publish them in the news paper.
Cheeky newspaper dude: Yeah!!! They're gonna be in Wikkid gallery.

Proceeding now is what you'd imagine a car coming down to a halt pause.

Me: Are you CRAZY?!?! Dude, we are almost through teenage and you guys treat this event that is figuratively draining us as a show piece for some lame ass 15 pages kid's magazine?! Damn man.
Masnoon: [cooling me down] nahi nahi.
Cheeky newspaper dude: Oh no, we'll really do something on this.
So few speakers are brought up. And I just snap their faces. Mind you, the camera was in auto mode and I had to put in no effort.

Cheeky newspaper dude: WOW! Perfect. I mean, you must be professional. Take my card. Perfect framing girl.

That WAS WEIGHTLESS FLATTERY. How makhan can people get? I banged in his face the insults but he gulped it all down. Boo, Check wikkid or something for some stupid photos.

The only good thing was getting a trainer on court shoes for 4 hours. Tee-hee.
-out!-

Who lives in the pineapple under the sea?

2009-02-04T16:45:00.000+05:00

(SpongeBob)
Let's gather 'round the campfire,
And sing our campfire song
The C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song
And if you don't think that we can sing it faster
Then you're wrong
But it would help if you just sing along...
(Patrick)
Bum, bum, bum

(SpongeBob)
The C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song
The C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song
And if you don't think that we can sing it faster
Then you're wrong
But it would help if you just sing along...

(SpongeBob)
The C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song
Patrick!
(Patrick)
SONG! C-A-M-P-F...
(Spongebob)
Sqidward!
(Squidward)
...
(SpongeBob)
Good!
It would help!
It would he-e-elp!
If you just sing along!
O YEAH!

xD w00t!